The Pursuit of Happiness

We are one day shy of September’s midpoint. I am one day shy of a full week of the new drugs. I’m just shy of a fortnight sans fitbit wearing.

I am always, always shy. (True story)

You know what?

I feel pretty good.

It was weird to not know how many steps I’ve taken and stairs I’ve climbed and minutes I’ve moved. It has thrown off my giant spreadsheet tracker of trackingness.

But now? It’s a little freeing. I don’t have to pace the bedroom and go up and down the stairs because 11,000 steps is more desirable than 10,796. (I have done this. The architect can verify.)

Other than missing my Friday night/Saturday morning doses of drugs, my new “TAKE YOUR DAMN PILLS, WOMAN!” app is working for me.

I’m letting go of things that cause more anxiety than they’re worth. I’m adding things that make me smile.

Job is maybe the only exception to letting go of things that cause more stress than happiness. BUT, getting paid does make me happy, so at least for now, I’ll keep it.

I have energy! And motivation! And my social skills seem to be working moderately well!

My sister-wife and I maybe – and I’m going to blame the wine – decided to run a marathon Saturday night. Of course, the actual selection of said marathon and creation of training plans that happened on Sunday are maybe not something I can blame on the wine.

  1. 5K on Halloween
  2. 10K on Thanksgiving
  3. 13.1 (me!) on Valentine’s Day (BAWGs represent in Austin!)
  4. 13.1 on or abouts St. Patrick’s Day
  5. 26.2 in June…

It might be the drugs talking (it is absolutely the drugs talking), but things are looking up.

The only downsides? Side effects.

  2. I cannot eat very much in one go and seem to have no hunger trigger, so I’ve been forgetting about things like “food.”
  3. There were some other weird things the first couple of days that seem to be okay.
  4. Also – touching. Saturday night was all about DO NOT TOUCH ME ANYTHING! No cats. No people. I removed as many clothes as I could and still be decent sitting on my floor drinking wine and watching PG P0rn. (NATHAN FILLION! ALAN TUDYK!) It is terrible and you need to not watch it if you are related to me or I know you because my dad was your minister. Everyone else, carry on. NSFW – possibly NSFL(ife). I laughed a lot.

Anyways – positivity? What’s that all about?

I feel like I’ve smiled more the last three days than I had the last three months. Things are looking good.


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