Sweet Dreams

Amy Cissell
December 8, 2015
Aggressive Happiness, Blessed are the Cheesemakers, Gin, Cheese & Other Necessities, Made of Awesomesauce, Run Away!, Write Now!
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I hardly ever dream anymore. I think it’s all the drugs I’m on. When I do dream, they are a combination of bizarrely realistic and realistically bizarre.

I miss dreaming. I’ve always had the most fantastic dreams.

Fortunately the drugs aren’t fucking with my ability to daydream. Or “storyboard in my head,” which is what I call it when I want to sound productive.

Since finishing up my 50,000 words in November, I’ve been in a bit of a slump. I haven’t written in an entire week (!!!) although I have spent a decent amount of time staring a blank screen. It’s ridiculous, really. I have the rest of the book loosely outlined. I know the milestones that will be reached. I may not know exactly how my characters are going to get there (they are constantly surprising me), but I know they are going to get there.

I also didn’t trail run on Sunday, even though I promised the internet. I am a very bad person in desperate need of punishment.

Can’t quite remember what comes next…heh

Things that have been going well:

I’ve been sticking with my vegan before six plan, and except for a Scandinavian Fair piece of lefse (which, let’s be honest, I totally get a pass on that) and an accidental 4:30 pm cookie (which I probably don’t need a pass on), I’ve been very successful. That’s eight days of pre-dinner veganism. Eight days with homemade chocolate chip cookies in the house (my one sweets weakness) and only one pre-six PM cookie!
And you know what? I feel fantastic. It’s not nearly as hard as I thought it was going to be. I even ordered a vegetarian thing without the cheese while lunching in an Irish pub, because I am obviously ~~crazy~~ committed to this thing. I’ve also noticed that while my dinners are definitely not vegan, they are tending more towards vegetarianism or meat as an accompaniment rather than a main dish. (Also, and this might be a fluke, I’ve lost just over 2 lbs.)
I went swimming today. I swam 1500 yards. It was my first swim in over six months when I decided in my heart to abandon triathlon training (I didn’t decide out loud to my coach for a while after that because GUILT!). It was also my fastest non-race swim of the year. I always forget how much I love swimming. I think I forget when swimming involves drills and workouts and shit like that. I just like to go to the pool and do sets of 300 yards until I run out of time. Nothing fancy. No kicking or pulling or stroke counting. Just freestyle.

This still terrifies meI love it so much that I swam until I was 40 weeks pregnant.

I haven’t read any new books, which means I’m probably not going to get to 150 new books read this year. That’s probably okay. There is likely nothing wrong with reading 127 new books in one year.

The architect & I are trying to determine how to configure our living room so I can set up the bike trainer again. I actually uttered the words, “I miss riding.” Between that and the lack of cheese in my diet, I can only conclude that I have well and completely lost my mind.